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Confessions Poetry

Confession. No1

Confessional piece.
On loving and trying to find space to understand.

A look into love. You and me. Thoughts of a forgiving heart on the mend.

You violated me.

Peeled me into shreds.

 

Turning my roots, to branches.

 

 My skin found ways to breathe.

Sucking on your misery.

Pleasuring your body.

Left me naked.

Pulled me from the skin.

Pulled me from past sins.

I could see,

The beast within me,

The beast of you,

You feed.

You lie.

You chain.

The pain an excuse,

to call me other names.

 

I cower,

Afraid to look into your eyes

To afraid to see,

How much misery loves company.

 

I have been thinking a lot about fear and how it alters perception. What does it mean to live in fear? How does this connect and alter our connections to other persons and how does it limit our capacity to love? I feel that if you have a large amount of fear in your body, then it is impossible to love with the depth and thoughtfulness of space and becoming. Whatever you are afraid of, will lynch and suffocate the beings you love, whether consciously or unconsciously you are limited and tied to the beliefs that you hold inside your body. What do you hold inside your body? How does it feel to breathe as you?

What does it mean for you to love the persons you are in community with? Does fear dictate your heart- loss and grief- or hope and becoming? There is no shame or right answer in this but I feel it’s the knowledge of knowing that this is what you are giving. We are here to be in love with one another and we are here to imagine new possibilities of living. This may not be possible if you believe you can imagine what another person can be. Knowing the limit of your imagination is leaving space the infiniteness of the cosmos aka your loved ones.

This year has shown us what lives beyond our control. Everything and Everyone deserves the space to breathe. To imagine as ourselves; without apology- without conditions.  If you call them home and family, trust their vision to reveal a space that gives love rather than fear. But don’t forget yourself as you do. The compass, the recognition that lives inside you may pave new paths and light new ways.

 

They came in the shadows. Lurking behind every happy moment and corner. They came in the shadows haunting me- turning me into a time machine of their horror, of their pain.

 I am left once again without a name.

Begging for a space to breathe.

I bend till my knees bleed.

They tell me,

Please forgive me.

 

Confession No1. 

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